save me, im lost.

My life has been going in one big downward spiral since I brought in the new year. I refuse to speak of any of the shit that has gotten me to this point of confusion but i just want to know what im suppose to do now. I dont know exactly what to do at this point and that frustrates me. I had my whole life mapped out and plans were made. 

i feel like a failure. people tell me everything happens for a reason but i dont know what this was suppose to show me. all its made me do is cry a lot and shut down. 

i need some sort of salvation.